Ted’s Cheatin’ Heart

Is killing me…

So, my cat Teddy doesn’t only have eyes for his Mama. What the F? I feed, water, feed, coddle, feed, snuggle, feed, give him paw-manis AND feed him! What thanks do I get in return?

What's up Pussycat?

What’s up Pussycat?

My neighbor’s cat McCain (who is a male, therefore making Teddy gay, which I already knew – and secretly love!) stopped Ted dead in his tracks.

Just one look...that's all it took.

Just one look…that’s all it took.

But Teddy is a Mama’s Boy! He always comes running when I call (or when I have a shiny, sequins shirt on because I’m his walking disco ball.  He can chase the reflection of my sparkles up the walls – oh to be a cat) and ignores everyone else. Never me.  I assume this is how parents of human children feel when their kids start dating?  What is a mom to do?!

Is this love...that's I'm feeling?

Is this love…that’s I’m feeling?

This went on long enough for Ted to ignore me while I walked by with a tuna fish (his favorite snack) sandwich, turned the sink on (when he usually comes running for our version of cocktails), spun around my living room in my sparkly shirt like an idiot trying to catch his attention and literally act like he didn’t feel me poking my finger into his shoulder.

I’ve heard of puppy love but kitty cat love? Is that even a thing?

This staring and pawing at the window and meowing and prancing back and forth must have lasted eight whole minutes (which to me felt like eight years).

And then it happened. Teddy got dissed.

Great. Now I have to deal with cat heartache.

Great. Now I have to deal with cat heartache.

Suddenly McCain slinked away like Teddy didn’t ever mean anything to him. The nerve! My ball of fur patiently waited and waited and WAITED for this new love to come back and grace him with his presence.  But McCain never reappeared.

Slowly, Ted came crawling back onto my lap, wanting major Mama consoling. Maybe kitty cat love isn’t so bad – I mean it will never work out in the end and therefore, I will always be his hero by picking up the shattered pieces of his broken heart.

But of course I did get to rub his wet little nose in his misery by singing, “Your cheatin’ heart will make you weep…”  And then explained that cats can be so bitchy.

Ah, the perils of being a cat mom.


24 thoughts on “Ted’s Cheatin’ Heart

  1. 1EarthUnited says:

    Poor Teddy cat! He’ll have some story to tell his (adopted) kids someday!

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