Tampon-tacular Ted

You know those (highly obnoxious) people who think their kid is more outstanding than any other? The kind that boasts with the ‘my child is on the honor roll’ bumper sticker type? Well, I’m now that proud parent who can’t wait to scream how fabulous my feline is from the hilltops of Tennessee.

And why you wonder? Not only can Teddy bring me birds while I soak in the bathtub (click here to read about his adorableness), he can hunt and gather…wait for it…wait for it….tampons!

Hunt and Gather

Tough Teddy on the prowl.

I was minding my own business when Ted burst through the door like his tiny tail was on fire. My immediate thought was “Jesus. Please don’t let it be anything still living,” (as my sweet Bear once brought a live mouse into the bed one night at 3am….I thought he was taking one hell of a bath (smacking his lips like he was eating fried chicken) and when I went to drag him up by my face, he had a little friend…pleasant experience) and it took a second to realize what kind of prey he’d ‘hunted’ out of my purse (he’s also very good at confiscating toothbrushes – read here).

proud feline

Protecting his kill. My heart bursts with pride.

As he spit the tampon out at my feet, I felt a little tear come to my eye. Not from being overwhelmed with happiness that my cat just killed another inanimate object but tears of sheer delight streamed down my cheeks as I laughed my ass off (I wish it was that easy).Β  What would I do without the comical fur ball love of my life?

I’m just trying to figure out what my braggy, boasting bumper sticker should say…

CBXB

CBXB!

42 thoughts on “Tampon-tacular Ted

  1. Amanda says:

    Cats never fail to entertain, that’s for sure!

  2. Mancakes says:

    Now..if you can train him to fetch tampons, chocolate, and booze for a week each month he will officially be the best man in the history of the world. πŸ™‚

  3. Tracy says:

    ROTFLMAO!!! That is one smart cat – now get him to fetch your drinks for you! πŸ™‚

  4. LMFAO!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!

  5. Hahaha! You make mum and I giggle! Good Teddy! I’m obsessed with cotton buds… I steal them from the bin and give them to the turtles through the grate on top of the turtle tank! Hehe! Bisous Bailey

  6. Phil Lanoue says:

    If this keeps up you may wish to consider some therapy for the boy, although he very likely thinks he doesn’t need it.
    I can see it now…
    Therapist: “So Theodore tell me, what phrase best describes your life?”
    Teddy: “Hey, I gotta be me.”

    I can’t wait to see what you come up with for a bumper sticker on this one. πŸ˜€

    • Phil – you KNOW your cats – especially Ted. This is exactly how he’d react and then he’d piss out of the litter box just for making him see a therapist. Still mulling the bumper sticker phrase over….

  7. AGIE says:

    Now that is funny!!! TED TOTALLY ROCKS!!!!

  8. chef mimi says:

    Hahahahahahaha! That is too funny!

  9. Janie Bengard says:

    Teddy is so tricky and such a good hunter!

  10. I think I just DIED of laughter! Who said fetch was only for dogs.

  11. Such pride he takes in his fetchings.

  12. I have a whole cabinet full of tampons from the good old days when they were needed around here…bring Teddy over! We can drink shots for each one he brings out.

  13. MOL!
    Well, you could put the last picture with a legend πŸ˜‰
    Purrs

  14. dannadesigns says:

    LOL! What a great hunter!

  15. vudragovich says:

    My Kat Will Out Hunt Your Honor Student!

  16. kellisamson says:

    You need to start filming these escapades!

  17. Healthy Glow Nutrition says:

    Yes, please film Teddy in action one day! He is incredibly entertaining πŸ™‚ I wish he would have been at my mini manse a few months ago when I had a mouse that made itself very comfy here, although Teddy bringing me a “mouse gift” in my bed would bring me nightmares lol

    • Oh I can share Ted and his hunting skills anytime needed. He’s a chill traveler but a high maintenance eater. He eats duck and pea dry food. But I’ll send plenty. Let us know when he needs to head your way and I will be sure to tell him to keep the caught critters off of the bed!!!

      • Healthy Glow Nutrition says:

        Oh my that poor little mouse wouldn’t last long here πŸ˜‰ I so wish we were neighbors, Teddy would be the most admired and spoiled cat in the hood. Duck? No problem! I’d serve it to him in a crystal dish πŸ™‚

      • Teddy already adores you but getting crystal out? He may leave me for you!!

      • Healthy Glow Nutrition says:

        Oh no he would never leave his mommy who brought him into a loving home:) I would just be like the aunt without kids that spoil their nieces and nephews πŸ™‚

  18. Great party trick and I am sure will entertain any house guest!

  19. […] proudly corralled tampons like John Wayne did […]

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