How to Throw Down at a Christening

Prior to witnessing the baptism of your twin niece and nephew, it’s important that they start the day happy.

Rise and Shine!

Rise and Shine!

It’s also equally important to fill up on bottles of adult beverages in preparation for a Christening celebration (that, and the fact that you didn’t start on fire upon entering a church).


Baptism of twins equals twice the party fun!

Be sure to add personal touches in decorating by displaying pics of those near and dear holding the babies.


Can you spot CBXB sticking out like a sore thumb?


My sister, the mother of infant twins, also finds time to create art with all of her spare time.

Food is essential when celebrating babies being dunked in holy water, so have a nice spread.


Sweets, sandwiches and salads…oh my!

Play kissy face with one of the guests-of-honor when she refuses to go down for a nap (not wanting to miss out on any of the fun…taking after Auntie CBXB!).


Future social butterfly.

Keep the cocktails flowing with an open bar, new mom and tasty beverages.

Keep the cocktails flowing

Pour me another, please!

Have a camera in hand at all times to catch each and every second of the day drinking celebration (you’re doing it for the babies, of course).

Turn into a tourist

Turn into a tourist in your sister’s home.

All of the photo snapping will make you very thirsty, leading to a case of the double fists.

Double fist in honor of know a drink for each.

I did this in honor of twins…you know a drink for each.

Force your dad to try drinks unknown to him (which would be anything other than Natty Light and Taaka (rot gut) vodka).

Force feed martinis

Force feed martinis.

Once the party is fully underway, keep the chips and dip within an arm’s reach so as not to starve due to over consumption of wine. Or beer. Or vodka. Or Captain.

Be sure to have the chips and dip CLOSE

Rehydrating with sodium filled potato chips and the best dip ever Anderson Erickson French Onion (one of the best things in Iowa!).

To further the celebration, break out the cigars!

Get out the cigars

Don’t usually smoke? Have a cigar anyhow.

Partaking in cigars when one usually doesn’t smoke leads to the party clock striking midnight and lights out…almost immediately.

Snooze your brains out.

My bed buddy. Not affected by the cigar smoke but clearly happy the party is over.

One can try to sleep the Christening party off the next morning but sometimes you forget that babies get up at the ass crack of dawn. No. Matter. What.

Party pooped out .... well at least I am.

Party pooped out …. well at least I am.

And excitedly remember that babies also tend to only sleep, eat and shit the rest of the day. Score!

Just like her Auntie CBXB

Trying to be just like her Auntie CBXB with a sleep mask. Love!

And that folks is how you thrown down at a Christening.

Bless your heart.



23 thoughts on “How to Throw Down at a Christening

  1. Good Lord, you must be Catholics!!

    Those kids TOTALLY suck at not respecting a good hangover! It’s one of their worse features.

  2. That is awesome!!!! I love the rise and shime picture…can’t help but to smile at that.

  3. That spread on the table, drooling!!!! Cupcake, yummy. I like your sister’s art. Good job sis.

  4. Phil Lanoue says:

    Humm…well I’m thinking you might have had juuuuust enough beverages to get everyone through the event.
    Looks like it was a fun day!

  5. Kati says:

    Anderson Erickson dip is awesome! B and B are adorable! What’s this about churches burning down? Jesus drank too. Right?

  6. You are so irreverent. I get it! I totally understand you and appreciate your take on religious stuff (church-ladies — they totally eek me out). My hunch is the reason you didn’t get struck by lightning when you went into the church, is that your heart is SO in the right place, which is way more important than someone’s pious genuflection being at the right time, in the right place. I’m convinced that being self-righteous and judgmental is the biggest “sin” anyone can commit. I’m so happy that you enjoyed your twins’ celebration with gusto!

    • Your comment just made my life. I’m serious! Thanks for ‘getting it’ and eloquently explaining how and why. πŸ™‚

      • You’re welcome–I do get it. I try to get people, but often I don’t. Just happened to click with you. I’m somewhere in the middle when it comes to churchiness, yet was unable to raise middle-of-the-road kids. I have one very churchy son, one extremely anti-church, and strangely, I “get” them both. Probably because they have good motives & intentions–which is what matters to me most. What an honor–to make your life! I’m touched. πŸ™‚

  7. Mitzie Mee says:

    Cool! Maybe I should get Christened once again:)

  8. AGIE says:

    AWHH.. Those babies!!! So so so cute!

  9. SerachShiro says:

    Love this holy party, in name of the babies who are blessed to have such a great family! And by the way I would love to taste that dip sauce of Iowa πŸ™‚

  10. Lol… this just got me cracking up, real funny

  11. Congratulations and it looks like a good time was had by all!
    Good job on the food;it all looked nice.

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