Weekend Winks – Santa Style

Santa! I've been good! At least to myself...

Santa! I’ve been good! At least to myself…

What would Christmas be without a workplace dirty Santa party, last-minute shopping and sitting on a red suited man’s lap? I’ll answer for you – it would be beyond boring.

I arrived to work on Friday, greeted by slightly adjusted decorations in my office…

You wanna F with me?

You wanna F with me? Paybacks are a bitch.

Do you have fun like this in your workplace? Too bad.

Our work version of Santa.

Our work version of Santa and his two elves.

Some people take the title of Dirty Santa to heart.

Dirty Santa = Dirty Minds

Dirty Santa = Dirty Minds.

Funny things happen at work parties. Like 8×10 photos of yourself becoming part of the decor.

Fully clothed in a bathtub, naturally.

Fully clothed in a bathtub, naturally.

While I slept off Friday night shenanigans, my twin niece and nephew were frolicking resting in the Iowa snow.Β  I’d like to call attention to yet another way my overly classy family uses plastic grocery sacks (we already utilize them as Easter baskets and I use them for Ted’s litter pan and Mr. Bear likes to use them as a bed) but please take a closer look at my niece’s feet. No snow boots? If you have a plastic bag, no problemo.

Reduce. Reuse. Recycle.

Reduce. Reuse. Recycle.

After sucking down enough caffeine for all of Santa’s elves, I hopped in my sleigh and headed to the poshest Nashville mall, where I had just enough luck to have sore shoulders from lugging all of the packages around. How does Santa do it?

Santa! I've been good! At least to myself...

Needed: Eight reindeer for package purposes.

What better way to celebrate shopping and First Mate’s birthday than with a strawberry martini?

'tini break.

I’d better rest my weary shopping legs….for three hours.

And as we sat and chit chatted the afternoon away, we came up with the scheme of the season.

Blondes have good ideas, too.

Blondes have good ideas, too.

We thought it’d be a good idea to snuggle up to (I tried not to maul) our favorite man in red and solidify our names on his nice list with our girlie ways (I really needed to after my naughty shenanigans of weekends past).

Santa! I KNOW him!

Think Santa fell for us?

It’s been a year of babymania (there must be something in the water – thank God I drink liquor all the time) and I stopped by the hospital to welcome the newest handsome fella to my circle of friends’ ever expanding brood.

Big E with Auntie CBXB.

Big E with Auntie CBXB.

Famished after all that baby holding I headed to my folks house where we had an early Christmas celebration, as I won’t be joining my fam in Iowa for the big holiday.

Spread it.

Oh the snacking is so delightful…

And because the snacks weren’t enough, I had to stuff my face at dinner as well (thus trying to keep my annual holiday tradition of adding 10 lbs to my already ample derriere alive).

So keep eating...

…and the added pounds are always so frightful.

Turns out I was rewarded for all of my bawdy behavior this year (Santa must have a fun sense of humor).

Hit me.

Naughty girls can finish first.

What’s Ted thinking about all of this endless Christmas celebrating? He can barely be bothered, wanting to sleep the rest of the holiday away.

Sleeping the holiday away.

What a little scrooge!

Whatever this holiday week brings you, we hope it’s full of happiness!




29 thoughts on “Weekend Winks – Santa Style

  1. MerryChristmas and warm wish for a fab new year. Drink one for me as you ring in the New Year!

  2. deanjbaker says:

    good to see, nice photos

  3. kellisamson says:

    Merry Christmas! From the looks of that pile from your fam, you’ve been a very good girl this year {or else they don’t read your blog?!}!

  4. markbialczak says:

    Gifts galore already! A certain photogenic blonde in Nashville knows how to work Christmas just right. I don’t know how that mall Santa will ever go back to little kids after hosting you and the First Mate, CBXB! I think he got home from work that night, his wife took one look at his face and she screamed, “What did you do!” Keep making merry, my friend. Oh, yeah, I use the plastic baggies when I walk Ellie B, aka Dogamous Pyle, if you know what I mean.

    • Glad to hear you put those plastic bags to good use, too! HA!
      I hope we didn’t get Santa into too much trouble with the Mrs. Oh what am I saying? I don’t care, as long as I got moved to the “nice” list ’til tomorrow morning! πŸ™‚ Hope you have a fabulous Christmas and thanks for being such a good friend!

  5. Aussa Lorens says:

    And, as usual you’ve got me in the mood for wine and lots of food stuffs– starting tonight, huzzah! Merry Christmas to all of you over in that crazy life of yours πŸ™‚

  6. JMC813 says:

    Merry Christmas CBXB. You too Mr TED!!! and a HAPPY NEW YEAR!

    John (JMC)

  7. Awe, look at you and your cat. Great times to follow your life as usual. Have a great Christmas! I’m glad to have met you this year and look forward to more of your nonsense next year.

  8. The Regular Guy NYC says:

    Booze and shopping go hand in hand! Have a great Christmas and holiday week!

  9. Phil Lanoue says:

    Have a great Christmas! (I know you will) Hope Santa brings you a bottle of The Captain and me my favorite bourbon. (I know he will)
    All the best… Phil

  10. SerachShiro says:

    Lovely photos and you shall never be bored, I saw you had a busy schedule before Christmas πŸ™‚ ! A big kiss to TeddyScrooge and you, Happy holidaysssssss πŸ™‚ !

  11. I am sure those two babies bring lots of happiness and more to come in the future. I like the green hat πŸ™‚ on your nephew.

  12. Santa clearly appreciates anyone who loves Christmas as much as you! πŸ™‚

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