Two Pussy Lovers in a Pod

It’s not every day you go on vacation and meet your soul mate.

Pussy lovers unite!

Pussy lovers unite!

We all know by now that I’m a cray cray cat lady. If you don’t believe me, check out my bawling episode in Ernest Hemingway’s cat cemetery post from last year.

Yep. I did this.

Yep. I did this.

So imagine my delight when I realized there was a living, breathing male pussy loving version of myself when I visited Sunset Pier in Key West.

I knew as soon as our eyes met that he might just be the perfect man for me (I mean, he lives in on the beach and hoards cats like yours truly albeit he’s about 65) as he wrangles seven cats with the ease of me slurping down a Skinny Pirate.

Back in his glory days tempting ladies with that mullet. And that vest.                 photo  catmanofkeywest.com

What’s the most telling sign that we’re meant to be together (besides the fact that his name is Dominique and he speaks with a French accent. *sigh*)?

The fact that he’s known as The Cat Man.

I took this to heart as I was recently bequeathed the nickname of Cat Woman from my pharmacist (after I had to get a prescription filled for a stray cat I’ve taken in and unemotionally lovingly named New Cat – it was a master blaster hearing that name called over the loudspeaker).

Yep. Seriously.

Yep. Seriously.

As I watched The Cat Man prep the fur balls for the upcoming show, I elbowed six-year-olds in the head so as I could score a seat in the front row.

Pussy prep.

Pussy prep.

Clapping among six year olds.

Clapping among toddlers.

What makes The Cat Man ultra impressive is the fact that he can get cats to do tricks…with each other (anyone who’s ever owned a feline knows how cooperative they tend to be).

Pussy whisperer.

Pussy whisperer.

Two at a time.

Synchronized stool sitting.

Fire

Ring of fire.

Teddy has some work to do.

Teddy clearly has some work to do.

What was the shining moment in our budding May-December romance?

Our shared characteristic for the love of a camera. Although I couldn’t really tell if he was flirting with me (and the other 94 peeps that wanted a photo with him) or trying to get rid of my stalking ass after I started to put my arm around him and he said:

“Stay where you are. Go back to your seat,” accompanied by his French accent.

Of course I refused to move without a snapshot of us.

When he caught wind of my cuckoo for Cocoa Puffs mentality over pussies, The Cat Man couldn’t help but lean into my Cat Ladyness and turned me into his own personal Leaning Tower of Pisa.

Lean

Close.

Lean 2

Closer.

Lean 3

My ass almost hit the pavement.

While no phone numbers were exchanged, we promised to meet again.  Well, really I told him I’d stalk see him again when I was back in Key West.

I’m now practicing tricks with Ted and New Cat in the hopes they can perform along with The Cat Man’s crew next year.

Fingers crossed I don’t set my mini manse on fire.

Cheers!

CBXB!

44 thoughts on “Two Pussy Lovers in a Pod

  1. You lucky lucky cat woman!! If only we could train our men like that!

  2. Phil Lanoue says:

    Humm… I suspect Ted’s best trick might be hacking up something disgusting on the floor for your bare feet to find when you stumble over to the fridge at 3am for a gulp of cold water to hopefully help combat dry mouth resulting from a big night out. (how’s that for a run on sentence?)

    And it’s not like I’m speaking from any kind of experience or anything regarding such an event happening to me, I’m of course just speculating.

  3. markbialczak says:

    No, you did not let him lean into your world like this, CBXB! I saw this guy perform his cat show at Mallory Pier in 1990, and I thought he was a member of AARP then!

    OK, I’ll back off. He’s your cat peep! Sorry. Whimper. Meow.

    And besides, anybody who can train a cat to act like circus lions and tigers must be pretty damn cool.

  4. Well… There is no way I can top that… Sigh… Lou is too cool to do tricks.

  5. Well, he actually looked quite fetching, way back when, with his mullet and all. I’m amazed that anyone can train a cat to do tricks. He must be very persuasive, just like you were with the photo shoot. 🙂

  6. I’m not sure to laugh or be very scared at this. Just don’t end up looking like him later on in life!

  7. VivBlogs says:

    Yep. Soul mate, found.

  8. There is nothing like a classic love story!
    On a completely separate note, I am really glad you didn’t go to Mexico as the ring of fire you bring home from that place is really something you don’t want to share with Ted or NC!

  9. JMC813 says:

    If I know Teddy like I think I do from your tales, he would settle for nothing less than role of director. Time to get him the megaphone and a folding chair with his name to meow orders from. And a word of advice for you. NEVER light the flaming hoop until NC can jump through it 100 times successfully. The mini manse should remain fire free that way. lol

    • You REALLY know my cats well. Teddy would so need to be the director. Actually, he’d demand it. And New Cat is clumsy as all get out (he even chases his own tail – bless his heart) and often stumbles as he runs down the hallway. So I think I’ll make it 1,000 times through the ring of fire for New Cat before I actually light it!

  10. SerachShiro says:

    love this post about the cat man, the photo of you both is so fun and it looked if he was really acting like a cat with his chest forward 🙂 ! Cool how he’s able to let do his cat’s all these tricks, Tedstar will be a star among them next year and you will travel around together the world with him and cat man………..hahaha :)!

  11. I love Key West! What a kookie community, I guess all that heat melts their brain cells or something! I have seen lots of shows on Sunset Pier, but never Cat Man! That is one weird guy! Love the Walgreen’s story!
    Jenna

  12. Kavalkade Krew says:

    LoL.

  13. FreeUrCloset says:

    Awww … we’ve met our CBXB soulmate here on the Cowboys and Crossbones blog!

    XOXO N & N

  14. Put Ted and NewCat in some Spanx and a fanny pack and let them do their new act at centennial park during CMA Music Fest. They will fit in lovely. Watch the money roll in.

  15. st sahm says:

    Pack your cute pink and black luggage and get your ass back to cat man! Dominique has available sons, right?! RIGHT?!

Holla at me!

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