Just One of the Guys

I’m never accused of being sensitive.

Unless you put me in a sack. Then I lose my shit.

Unless you put me in a sack. Then I lose my shit.

You can typically tease the bejesus out of me and not only will all of my feathers remain unruffled, I’ll be dishing it right back at you.  I owe this lovely trait to all of my male cousins because before my sister, I was the only girl on one side of the family and took plenty of shit.  I learned very early on how to stand my ground, play hard and tried not to cry (or “the boys will know it’s getting to you and that’s what they want,” true words of wisdom from Mom).

Doesn't seem fair, does it?

Doesn’t seem fair, does it?

As our extended clan grew my sister and I ended up being the only two girls out of 11 cousins and we encountered relentless teasing, rough housing and endless boys against girls games. (Is nine against two ever fair? Ever?)

Boys against girls.

Don’t let their good looks fool you.

Keeping everything tit for tat, if I had to play G.I. Joe with my male cousins, you bet your ass they played with Barbie dolls when visiting my house. Being oh-so-sweet (and such a little shit), I even gifted my cousin a Ken doll one year at Christmas (his best received present ever).

Forced to play with Barbies and he turned out fine. Obviously.

Forced to play with a Barbie doll and he turned out fine. Obviously.

As a kid, of course I wanted to do anything and everything my cousins did. I was a bedazzled little dude with attitude (which has bled into my adulthood).  So you can imagine my dismay one Christmas when all of my cousins got football helmets of their favorite teams and posed for photos as I jealously scowled at the dickheads.

I'll

I’ll just be over here…burning holes into your helmet heads with my beady eyes.

But what happened next was a true Christmas miracle.  My cousin, Barbie Boy (maybe making him play Barbies wasn’t such a good idea after all…) didn’t like his helmet because it was too tight on his head.

Tears of tightness

Tears of tightness.

Oh the horror for him but sheer holiday delight for yours truly (I then knew how the Grinch felt before his heart grew three sizes, which was pretty fabulous). I was all too happy to take a helmet from a hysterical, big-headed, bawl baby boy.

I can do anything you an do better....

Dry eyed and helmet headed. Feathers intact.

Suffice to say, I owe my thick skin to the dudes who surrounded me growing up, which has come in handy working in a male dominated industry today. Thanks to my cousins, I’ve mastered the art of being just one of the guys but it’s still fun to say…

Eat your crying heart out fellas.

CBXB

CBXB!

27 thoughts on “Just One of the Guys

  1. SwittersB says:

    My daughter, with 3 older brothers, is a touch little miss. She also understands boys/men inside and out. Great pics and fun read.

  2. Nancy says:

    Love this one. One of your best! Send me all your good vibes! Tomorrow is my D-Day!

  3. ricodilello says:

    Great post, I love the reaction from men when I tell them that my wife loves to fish. She catches, cleans and cooks them for me and all I have to do is buy her worms!

  4. Marcy says:

    Loved seeing those pics! xoxo marcy

  5. markbialczak says:

    Well, sure, but you’re still beautiful on the outside, too, damn you, CBXB!

  6. JMC813 says:

    Gotta say I knew this about you already, but be still my beating heart anyway! A beautiful woman who can hold her own (and sometimes one-up) with the boys. My kinda girl right there. There is no way anyone is allowed to dish it out if they are not prepared to take some too. I love to laugh at and tease people, but I enjoy laughing at myself even more sometimes. Bring it on is the way I see it. If you can’t laugh at yourself, you aren’t allowed to laugh at others. It seems there are 9 men in your family that never saw what hit em. Just simply awesome. Still jealous of the job that growing up this way prepared you for but that’s on me. LOL.
    Here is to your thick skin and badass self CBXB. Cheers!!!!

    • Oh sah-nap! It seems so funny the way that life can turn out – having rough housing boy cousins who teased me endlessly about everything from my big butt to my gigantic red glasses I used to have to wear – which prepped me to be surrounded by work ‘brothers’ who get a kick out of doing the same thing! But I wouldn’t have it any other way, you know? Makes every day some sort of fun! If you can’t laugh at yourself, what’s the point? I knew you were my kind of fellow long ago!

  7. kellisamson says:

    I, too, am also happy to have grown up with just guys – three brothers! It definitely makes work easier since I know that what I see is what I get. Imagine how different we’d be if we had been surrounded by estrogen are entire childhoods?!

    • Oh jeez. My high maintenance ass would have morphed into some kind of diva who thought she ruled the world. Now, I think I rule the world but I know that it’s my world, thanks to all of the testosterone! AND like you said, what we see, is what we get!

  8. SerachShiro says:

    I love this story, someone had to tell it also from the other side……..good work girl and compliments for all these lovely family photos especially of the one with you and the helmet, hahaha 🙂 !!

  9. stylentonic says:

    Love your hair and your red dress! Perfet pic! 😉

  10. I’m a horrible human being. The tears of tightness make me cackle like a, well, HORRRIBLE HUMAN BEING.

  11. Phil Lanoue says:

    Seeing this post title made me think of that Jenny Lewis song.

  12. I always love your post ❤ this one's just great! Good for you you got your helmet.. with my family it was more the other way around, soooo many girls and one male cousin, I still tried to steal his He-Man sword one Christmas, but he wasn't having any of it 😀

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