It’s National Cat Day folks.
This is the biggest holiday of my year (don’t judge) as most of you know just how cuckoo for fucking Cocoa Puffs I am about my pussy, Teddy B. He’s the yin to my yang. The side to my kick. The “me” to my “ow”. So in a dire attempt to make my furball love me all the more, I present you with an ode to the best bear on the planet…
Ahem.
Oh Ted you bring so much joy and good cheer,
Even when your piercing looks could kill.
Always a sport when I dress you up,
You never lose your cool when the costume fucks up.
Cinco de Teddy was a highlight one year and
while I was sure we had matching sombreros,
I’m pretty sure you were trying to figure out
how to pierce my heart with an arrow.
Bunny ears aren’t your favorite as you made very clear,
So I made you a pirate, in which (I kinda think) you revered.
Today is your day and in honor of you,
I will break out my finest kit cat attire.
I’ll be sure to slip on your favorite tie –
before you try to murder me by hire.
The night will be yours to do as you please.
Whether it includes Skinny Pirates, shots of Jell-O,
or your favorite vino to help you chill and be mellow.
We were both beyond blue
when New Cat passed suddenly this year.
Although beyond annoying, we’re heartbroken he permanently left our crew.
Celebrate you we will with all kinds of fun,
As my Earth tends to revolve around your sun.
Happy Teddy Bear Cat Day to all of our furiends!
CBXB
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