Is there anything better than a Christmas pageant?
Growing up, my sister and I were forced couldn’t wait to deck out in our finest holiday threads and put on the white trashiest show we could muster for our Gma and Gpa Morris.
Due to the fact that I’ve chosen not to create spawn from my own loins, I look to carry on this particular family tradition with main fur ball squeeze, Mr. Ted E. Bear. He’s grown into having a real knack for knowing when to hit notes on cue.
The newest members of our brood, however, could give two shits about partaking in the singing festivities. Either that or Ted has forced suggested he remain the one and only star of the 2016 Pussy Pageant.
As far as my little chug goes…
Therefore, please enjoy “Deck the Tree,” sung to you by my favorite pussy in the entire world, Mr. Ted E. Bear.
Deck the tree if you can move me
Fa-la-la-la-la-la-la-la-la.
‘Tis the Season to be curious
Fa-la-la-la-la-la-la-la-la.
Move me and I’ll claw your eyes out
Fa-la-la-la-la-la-la-la-la!
Troll the same box I see every single year
Fa-la-la-la-la-la-la-la-la.
See the blazing pink before me
Fa-la-la-la-la-la-la-la-la.
Watch me almost catch on fire
Fa-la-la-la-la-la-la-la-la.
Break for naps, merriment is exhausting
Fa-la-la-la-la-la-la-la-la.
Soak in all the glittery glory
Fa-la-la-la-la-la-la-la-la.
I’m the only star in this joint
Fa-la-la-la-la-la-la-la-la.
I just found my newest chew toy
Fa-la-la-la-la-la-la-la-la.
Eliminate all other feline competition
Fa-la-la-la-la-la-la-la-la.
Remind your mom that you’re her one and only…
FA-LA-LA-LA-LA-LA-LA-LA-LA!
You’re welcome for your new favorite Christmas caroler.
CBXB

p.s. – only 13 more days to Fuck Yeah 2017!