How to Be a Fictitious Rich Bitch

Do you have any idea how tough it is to show up to work and be requested to ride in a Rolls-Royce?

Do you?

Rough ride in the Rolls Royce...

My chariot of the morning.

And, I assume you also have no clue how to carry on the facade of wealth while inside the insanely pimp ride. You must dress the part, of course – complete with riding gloves and a sparkly skull pinkie ring.

I'm rich, Bitch.

I’m rich, Bitch.

Oh Daaahling, do you know how good your feet feel when placed upon furry, plush, cashmere floor mats?

Cashmere Dahling!

Not a feature in your Ford Focus?

Can you imagine how difficult it is steering a wheel that probably costs as much as your college education?

Wheelin' and dealin'

Could most likely be hawked for a small house.

Do you have any idea how hard it is to read a proper clock in an automobile? Do you?

blah blah

Who needs digital?

Now you know the difficulties of trying to appear like a rich, high profile person (and pretending to conceal said richness) while traveling in a Rolls.

You’re welcome.

How high maintenance can this rich bitch be?

Not smiling makes you look wealthier, right?

The drive home from work is going to be oh-so-ordinary tonight but that’s nothing a Skinny Pirate can’t fix.

First world problems are such a bitch.

CBXB

CBXB!