Why yes, yes they do.
Living in Nashville the closest department store we have that could be called semi-chic would be our teeny, tiny Nordstrom. While visiting Miami, I got giddy (like leave nose and finger prints on the outside glass window giddy) as I perused the luxury stores at the Bal Harbor Shops. When I sat down to try on upscale (compared to my Nine West usuals) boots, I felt like Cinderella getting to try on fancy footwear I drool over online.
After about three seconds, I found my fairy tale boots.
Oh yeah. I’m in Bal Harbor, pawing every boot in sight!
Oh the highly coveted red soles….sigh.
Then I slid my foot in, expecting for my life to be suddenly transformed when I zipped them up and strut about the store. And that’s when the storybook magic abruptly stopped.
The life changing moment.
And, my life was transformed. I discovered I had fat calves from f’ing running up Nashville hills and these boots would only zip for a rich, skinny calf. Now I was the ugly step sister, not Cinderella.
Look how far the zipper is from closing!
The clock didn’t even need to strike midnight before my boot dreams were dashed.
Turning to pumpkins before my very eyes!
But never fear, my ultra generous Fairy Godmother appeared! And after a wave of her wand, I was gifted these fabulous, non-calf-discriminating boots (which are beyond gorgeous and way more my speed than the knee-high (or what I call hooker) boots)!
Thank God my ankles are skinny!
And poof! I was transformed into the Belle of Chanel.
Now how do I ration calories from my calves?
Seriously. How?
CBXB
Cowboys and Crossbones 