Trashtacular Toddler Sitting

With almost every single one of my friends procreating their brains out, it’s hard to get together when they have to jump through hoops with husbands, schedules and finding childcare.

A solution search for more girl time, I ran across this posting on Craigslist … and think I may have found the answer.

Posted: August 13: Bibbysiter Avaelible (cuntry area of Nashvul)

Lookin for a sumbuddy to kinda watch ur cids while u have a gud tyme?

Plees considr me.

My name is Daryhul and I am vury gud at watchin baebees.

Look kids, no hands.

Bib for baby, hands for beer.

Need a gurl’s nite owt?

Time to partay.

On the prowl with no offspring.

Or do u want to sneek to the laek and shotgun som buhr?

Who cares about the kids? They're in good overalls.

Who cares about the kids?

Faster!

They’re in good overalls.

Possubley a nite owt on maine strete or a roll in the haye with yur boyfrund of the weke?

Flavor of Week

All gussied up.

 If u brang yer cids to me, I cud rock them on my bales of hae.

bibbysitter

Expert at rocking babies on straw.

Brung yer cids to my hous fer a small hoerly pryce.

Playground.

Every child’s dream playground.

I wul evun let them swam in the puhl.

Swimming

Beating the heat.

Plese send me a leter or jest drup bye.  Im avaleable most daes and nites.

Daryhul

I wonder if this dude also pet sits? It really doesn’t matter, Ted would hate his overalls.

But at least I’ve found a solution for us gals to get together more often, right?

CBXB

CBXB!

How to Rescue a Pussy!

Last week I told you about a babysitting post I found from a hillbilly named Daryhul (in his own words, Bibbysiter Avaelable) on Craigslist (click here to view entire ad). While Daryhul seemed to lack the skills and expertise of grammar, spelling and the ability to use his brain, I thought I’d give him a whirl in watching my fur ball Teddy B. because the dude looked like so much fun (plus, I needed time away from unpacking my new mini manse).

All aboard to Daryhul's house (or rather, shack).

All aboard to Daryhul’s house (or rather, shack).

I mean, how could Ted not be happy residing in the bib of these overalls?

Look kids, no hands.

Snug as a bug in a…well, maybe not rug but scratchy denim material.

Apparently Mr. Bear didn’t agree and sent psychic signals to his buddies Zak, Roxy and Moe who we sometimes read about on our buddy David A. Vudragovich’s blog. Here’s what David had to say about his attempts at rescuing Ted from Daryhul’s bib overalls…

Teddy’s Great Rescue!

So our hero Teddy the Magnificent (close resemblance to stunt double in picture below) has been left at the craigslist.com Bibbysiter! GASP! THE HORROR!

what we are trying to save Teddy from...but since this image was on google images...we may already be too late!

What we are trying to save Teddy from…but since this image was on Google images…we may already be too late!

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One of his nine lives dangerously close to being stored in overalls while his human was off enjoying too many blue mason jars with Kitty, Muffy and Ellie Mae!

And this is where you join the story.

Cowboys and Crossbones (CBXB) has offered to let me finish Teddy, the Supreme Fluffy’s story and daring rescue, which will involve my three feline masters (yes, I admit, I live to serve the fuzzy ones, thank you for the swats)!

I have known CBXB for a bit here and I know I need to have some dramatic flair to be worthy of Teddy’s approval!

So I was going to have my three Katz bust out the heavy-duty powers of the Gods (actually just Zeus) but…I think there will be too much static in the air and I am sure you know what that does to fur! Plus their little noses will get shocked, completely unacceptable.

From Google Images (Just to kitten cute)

From Google images (Just too kitten cute)!

So what to do? What other strategy is there?

I GOT IT! I can let my Kitdies (you know a combo of kitten and kiddies?) CHARGE right in! Just ignore the writing on the picture and think “CHARGE FOR TEDDY!”

Scout fartBut my three run at different speeds and there are four Katz in the photo so everything is just so wrong!

Things are starting to look desperate for Mr. Ted!

CBCB Teddy

Then I had a thought!

We can drive to Nashville and rescue the fellow Blogger Kitten from the overall clutches of Daryhul!

From Google Images

                                From Google Images

But there was still some kat nip in their systems from last night’s party and they know not to drive under the influence!

So in the end this is what happened:2013-01-12 03.12.35

Zak scowled at me for not being a better story writer.

2013-01-16 04.46.41Roxy hid in the back of the cabinet so she would not end up in overalls too!

2013-01-14 19.38.19

And Moe played spooky kat and watched me fail as a kat rescue planner (good thing I have my day job as an insurance agent to fall back on).

So I think Teddy will just have to wait for Cowboys and Crossbones to return with her friends, from being on the prowl (watch out guys), and pick him up tomorrow.

Thank you for reading and send kat nip laced thoughts to Teddy!
Dave
Logo jpeg

UPDATE!

I’m sure you’re wondering how this all ended for Teddy…

WTF were you thinking? I KNOW.

WTF were you thinking? I HATE YOU!

Yeah, it’s safe to say we won’t be using Daryhul’s bibbysitting talents anytime soon.

And I will be paying for my lapse in judgement for the next five months…

CBXB

CBXB!