Holiday Hijinks

Holidays are meant to be spent with the ones we love and while it was my first Christmas away from family, I was with them in spirit (in more ways than one).

Muggin' with my fave Christmas moose mug.

Keeping the spirit alive this Christmas.

As I was getting my Griswold style drinking on, my twin niece and nephew were anxiously awaiting their first visit from Santa Claus.

Nestled in for Christmas Eve!

Can you tell the naughty from the nice?

While I was frolicking in my pjs and presents Christmas morning,



Ted was dressed in his finest green tree garb.

Meowy Christmas Bitches!

Meowy Christmas! My mom is a bitch.

As I was wrestling my Nashville cat, my sister was wrangling her two little munchkins in Iowa.

First Christmas

No worries. Santa found us. Gigi and Cray Cray found us. Auntie CBXB found us….

Keeping the love of shoes alive in this family (I mean, someone has to do it) I gifted little B her first pair of cowboy boots – it’s the first shoe any niece needs from an aunt living in Nashville, right?

Boot hater

New shoe lover. Be still my beating heart.

What first Christmas would be complete without a brand new swimsuit? I know, I know. I’m the best aunt ever. Cowboy boots and swimsuits – because all kids love receiving clothes.

horrible first Christmas

Horrible first Christmas.

Cutest Hawkeye ever.

Cutest Hawkeye ever.

Santa didn’t forget dear old Mr. Bear, either. He received a PetSmart gift card for his ultra cheap $60-a-bag cat foot (Ted has food allergies – you know, being low maintenance and all) which he was less than thrilled about.

Gee, thanks.

Gee, thanks.

When I told TB I was going to spend it on his food, he could have cared less. Little shit.

Such a snore.

Such a snore.

After lounging the day away, it was time for more moose to come out and play. Only this time there was a handsomely poured shot of peppermint moonshine in light up glasses.

Could it get any better? NO.


Moose? Mooses? Or Meese? You be the judge.

Being away from family over the holiday, I thought I would be beyond lonely. But because of fabulous friends (and cocktails and Ted of course), I never had a moment to feel alone.

Like fam

Feeling not sorry for myself.

New traditions were put in place this holiday season. Like, wearing your food.


Scared of my Bugle claws, aren’t you?

And fun times in downtown Nashville with those I love.

Four and photoing

Help. My glass is empty.

What do you do after what seems like endless Fireball shots being doled out at the bar?

You hold a photo shoot, of course.

Photo shoot!

Does my hair look good like this? Look at me, damnit!

Runaway bride eyes.

Runaway bride eyes.

Waiting for the Ford Modeling Agency to call. Clearly.

Waiting for the Ford Modeling Agency to call. Clearly.

After annoying the bar staff into oblivion, the rest of the evening kind of seemed to go like this…



And the next thing I know, I’m like this…

Just chill Mama

WTF happened to you last night, Ma?

What’s more fun than taking Christmas decor down hungover?


Not even when your cat not so delicately hoists his ass up on your piano top among glitter deer.

Which one of these is not like the other?

Which one of these is not like the other?

Tedstar is drawn to all things glittery like his mother. I think he secretly wants his fur to glisten.


Jealous much Mr. Bear?

I distracted Ted with tinsel while I went outside to cheat on him.



With this new little furball who sauntered into my outside nook at the mini-manse. He just appeared one day this December and I really want to let him in the house (especially when he follows me to the door) but I need to have him checked by the vet first.

I should adopt him, shouldn't I?

I should adopt him, shouldn’t I?

And I don’t have a cat carrier (because Ted rides swaddled in my lap while in a vehicle).

And I need to have a seriously long talk with Teddy to see if he’d be on board. He, too was a rescue kitty. Although now he lives like a king and can’t remember living a peasant life.

Speaking of living a king’s lifestyle, His Royal Highness Ted E. Bear helped me drive to the vet for his yearly check-up.

Helping paw.

A helping paw.

But as it turns out, the feline king had partied too hard the night before (wonder where he gets that trait?) and had an upchucking accident in the car. All over the steering wheel. And my leg. And my purse. And his blanket.

Let's hope this doesn't repeat itself New Year's Eve.

Even royalty falls from the throne once in a while.

Let’s hope this doesn’t repeat itself New Year’s Eve.