Weekend Winks – Holy Shits, Dips and Shots

There’s all kinds of crazy taking place in my Nashville bubble and I can’t say that I hate it.

Precious and I made our Billboard.com debut in music artist Ryan Kinder’sStill Believe in Crazy Love,” (scroll all of the way to the bottom of the article to watch the entire) video. There’s a long, fabulous story behind this experience I will share later (regarding Rapegate) but I did what any normal person does when they have their two seconds of fame.

Celebrating on a budget.

No pawtographs, please.

Naturally, I had to go out to toast my newfound famousness and First Mate was happy to oblige my obsession with myself.

Why am I not being bombarded?

While I basked in my glow of nothingness, the Iowa twins continue to morph into little people and are more hilarious than ever.

Princess B has been rocking pigtails, enjoying the Indian summer above the Mason Dixon line while she cheers her bro on in anything sports related.

Smiles for miles.

No. No it does not get any cuter.

Speaking of sports, I’ve been nil reporting on our tailgating shenanigans and Dada CBXB and I were in full force this weekend.

Her version of tailgating.

Our version of tailgating included almost every liquor under the sun, my dad’s self-dubbed “World Famous Wings,” the blogfamous “Eat Shit and Die Guacamole,” and snacks to soak up our hope of scoring any points against the number four ranked Penn State.

Spread right.

I made sure to be gussied up with sparkles and shine for a little extra luck for my Hawks.

Black, gold and perfectly bold Keds for Kate Spade sneakers.

Trying to one up Gwen Stefani by wearing my boyfriend’s face on my shirt instead of my shoe.

Much to our delight, we were able to do a traditional touchdown shot right before halftime because the Hawkeyes scored. Yeehaw!

We just wanted to drink….we didn’t think it’d actually be a good game!

As the second half wore on, our Cinderella team grew thisclose to beating the Nittany Lions with a last minute touchdown. Did you hear me screaming Saturday night?

 

The Hawkeyes did not hear my victory cries because they lost during the last play of the game with four seconds left. But we did an “E” for effort shot and are proud fans for hanging that close as an unranked, always overlooked team.

How ’bout them Hawks?!

Losers brunch was delish, as it was my dad’s self-dubbed “World Famous Omelette,” which never disappoints.

Breakfast of non-champions.

It’s been just over a month since I suddenly lost the furry little love of my life, Ted. And while I can’t yet write a full post about the magnitude of his loss to me, I miss him every single second of every single day.

But funny how I saw this Facebook memory and within minutes received a message from the gal who runs the cat rescue in which I’m a poster child, saying there may be someone I should go check out at Pet Smart if I was ready.

I have a love/hate relationship with the fucking memories that pop up on Facebook daily.

It took all of four seconds with my torso in the kennel to decide what the next chapter of pussy life will be like at the mini manse.

READY

A little shopping around with my newest pussy and shooting our first selfie before heading home.

Who doesn’t do this?

While the newest member of the fam has decided his fave place is under my bed, updates will follow as I mold him into my sidekick. Boy, he doesn’t know what the fuck he’s in for – hope he’s ready by Halloween for matching outfits.

Here’s to having a fabulous week.

Cheers!

CBXB

 

Beauty and the Beast

My gal pal, who is as pretty, preppy and classy as a Kate Spade clutch and I were recently killing time while waiting on a concert to commence.  And what do ladies do when bored?

Conduct a photo shoot at the table, naturally.

The photographer gave us strict instructions on how to pose for each pic with each of our interpretations having wide range.

Pose #1. Wacky

Kate Spade went for jazz hands, while I went for the trashtacular Miley Cyrus pose.

Wacky

Take 1: Beauty and the Beast – Peace Out.

Pose #2. Sexy

I chose a facial expression which made me resemble a middle-aged woman who just had her lips plumped. Very becoming, I know. Kate Spade went for gangsta cute, which I think she nailed.

Sexy...

Take 2: Beauty and the Beast – Simply irresistible.

Pose #3. Surprise

Naturally I went all out with my photo bombing face. Ms. Spade was unsure of what to do, so she studied my mad skills while I held the pose for a solid six seconds. I don’t even think I blinked.

Taking a gander at my mad skills.

Beauty taking a gander at the Beast’s hand/eye/mouth coordination abilities.

Kate Spade went for a scary surprise, while I was able to keep my “look how big my mouth is and white my teeth are when I wear red lipstick and how I’ve been able to keep my jazz hands as wide as possible due to show choir in high school” pose.

Classy and trashy all in the same pic. Guess which one I am?

Take 3: Classy, accompanied by wide-mouthed white trash.

You know my beastly ways try to keep everything sophisticated.

Always.

CBXB

CBXB!