Goodbye to Gma the Great

I’ve never been one to take my family or time with them for granted, so it was real bummer when my Gma passed away a few weeks ago. Not only was she one of my best buddies, I know I inherited her brutal honesty, ornery streak and love of having my fingernails polished.

An ode to my Gma, HJ who recently passed away…

Gma

Always one to laugh at surprises…

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…you took to my photobombing like it was one of your most treasured prizes.

Photo Bomb!

You never let anyone forget…

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…when it was time to celebrate you bigger than the national debt.

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I learned from the best…

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…how to celebrate my life full of zest.

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Now seriously Gma, you taught me to party harder than Mae West.

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A love of leopard you instilled….

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…which is now being passed down to the next generation, who’s thrilled.

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It’s so fun you two met at a skating rink…

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…even if after 44 years you still had to steal kisses quicker than an eye blink.

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Although I took after Gpa avoiding kisses, rather craving a hard drink…

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…you always insisted on showing your love, making sure everyone was in sync.

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Beauty sleep and a hairnet was apparently all that you needed…

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…but truly it was your hair ‘dos that always succeeded.

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So it was with glasses and confidence that I superseded…

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…the grace and confidence that you always heeded.

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I wish I would have felt more impeded.

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The Iowa State Fair you never did love,

probably because you couldn’t wear foot gloves.

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It will never be the same, not bringing you a corn dog…

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…and discussing how I ate my way through the fair like a prize-winning hog.

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Circled blacked out dates always meant you had a companion…

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…you always loved attention bigger than the Grand Canyon.

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Attending every homemade Christmas pageant we made…

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…and most likely secretly prayed…

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…that I would never end up a lonely old maid.

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The first to pass of five sisters, who lived out their misters,

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…you loved being pampered more than a fever blister.

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Your nails were painted the day before you passed…

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…and Jell-O shots without you will seem so miscast.

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Regardless of view near or afar, life will never be the same…

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…without you as my shining rock star.

I love you Gma.

Megan

CBXB!

Happy Mani-tines!

What’s a holiday (and yes, Valentine’s Day is a holiday) without a matching manicure?

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Ring my bell.

Hokey? Duh. Cute? Absolutely.

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Let your fingers spread the love.

After applying a base coat, apply two layers of pink and wait for it to dry completely (or you will not be feeling the love with smudged nails) before swiping one thick layer of red on the tips of your digits. Follow with your choice of top coat (I prefer Seche Vite Dry Fast top coat).

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Essie in Short Shorts and E! Live From the Red Carpet.

Now go get your nail love on!

CBXB

CBXB!

Fangtastic Fingers

I vant to suck your blood. Well, really I don't because it might ruin my nails.

I vant to suck your blood.
Well, really I don’t because it might ruin my nails.

Known for being anything but subtle, I choose coordinating holiday colors for my Hallowmani.

Forget the ghosts.

Who doesn’t match their mani to their decor?

After applying a base coat, I doubled up on Sally Hansen’s pumpkin hued polish in Crushed. Letting that dry a few minutes, I followed with a swipe of Orly’s GOTH on the tips of my talons and with a slightly steady hand (I like to have two glasses of wine before attempting this step) I glided Salon Perfect nail art in Silver Plated between the black and orange colors.

No matter what mani I’ve just completed, I always use Seche Vite Dry Fast topcoat. Always.

Terrifying trio.

Terrifying trio.

Curiosity almost killed New Cat (by yours truly), as he risked one of his nine lives to photo bomb my set-up.

Actually this little shit was more terrifying as I thought his tail was going to knock every knick knack over in sight.

My little shit taking my less than professional photo shoot down 14 notches.

But I kept my cool because that’s what a self-appointed Queen of Halloween would do, right?

Afterall, the Queen of Halloween. Naturally.

Naturally.

Happy haunting.

CBXB

CBXB!

Game Day Gussy Up

Is it possible to look fabulous during football season while waving a foam finger in the air?

Foam finger fail.

Fail at fabulousness.

Ever since I was a kid, wearing college colors for game day has been tradition.

Sporting my dad's college jersey. Yes. He was a football playing stud who also was a cheerleader.

Sporting my dad’s college jersey. Yes, he was a football playing stud who also was a cheerleader. Yes, he will sign an autograph for you.

Now that I’m an Iowa Hawkeye girl (that’s Big Ten Country for you non-sports folks – or anyone that has ever misidentified Iowa as the Potato State, addressed my beloved team as the Iowa Buckeyes or thought Kevin Costner lived there in a magic corn field of dreams) in a Nashville world, I always support my college alma mater while cheering hundreds of miles away.

Wearing my pride on my…

Skirts...

…skirt…

...sequins...

…sequins…

...and sweater.

…and sweater.

But why stop at typical fan wear that anyone can sport? If you’re really a team supporter you’ll be sure to accessorize your head to toe outfit.

Whole lotta Hawk.

With flags.

With rings.

With rings.

Gaudy earrings

With gaudy football earrings.

And let’s not forget the importance of matching our cocktails to our team of choice.

And

Appropriately holds one bottle of wine.

We live, breathe and sleep by our black and gold when it comes to college football season.

Taking it to the limits

Taking true fandomΒ  fabulousness to the limits.

Not wanting anyone to feel left out, the twins are even adorned with adorable Hawkeye gear.

Miniature Herkys.

It’s all fun and football games with Prince B and Princess B.

Being a lady (I use that term loosely) that takes any chance to celebrate, today I’m all gussied up in my finest black and gold threads in honor of College Colors Day (it’s seriously a day supported by The Collegiate Licensing Company).

No, we're not Southern Missisippi.

A gal in need of a Hawkeye throne.

And I wouldn’t be true to myself if I didn’t dress my nails up with matching gaudy polish.

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Team colored talons.

As for a foam finger, I’ve made a minor substitution in order to keep my family’s moonshine touchdown tradition alive this season.

The end all, be all importance of game day.

Moonshine shots with every seven points scored.

Shots with every seven points scored.

Who needs a foam finger with Hawkeye moonshine?

Now go get your game day gussy up on!

CBXB

CBXB!

And the A-Mani-dy Award Goes to…

Oh how Oscar night is filled to the brim with sequins, sparkles and mostly handsome dudes in tuxes. So due to the fact I wasn’t getting all gussied up in a fabulously gaudy gown, I set my sights on dressing up my manicure in honor of the Academy Awards.

The award...

Recipient of the Best Supporting Nails award.

To achieve these award winning nails, you’ll need two colors. A solid gold (which I happen to have a bottle of Chanel that is going for $90 on eBay. Why did I ever open this gift?!) and something as glittery as all get out.

Chanel and OPI

Chanel in Gold Fiction and OPI in Glow Up Already (which seriously must be named after a man).

After one coat of clear base, I applied two handsome coats of the Gold Fiction. I thought about leaving my nails a plain gold for all of three seconds.

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Way too blah for the Oscars, yes?

I applied one coat of OPI gold sparkle, concentrating most of the polish on the tips, trying to create a slight ombre look. Then swiped my freshly painted nails with one coat of Seche Vite Dry Fast Top Coat (best ever in the history of top coats. I swear).

Mission accomplished

Bubbly and glittering gold nails. A perfect awards night combo in my book.

While no statues were given out in my mini manse last night, Ted and I practiced our acceptance speech with my glimmering nails wrapped tightly around the bottle of bubbly acting as a stand in for a naked Academy Award trophy.

Of course the first person he demand I thank was him, naturally.

“I’d like to thank the Academy of Ted…”

CBXB!

Will You Be My Mani-tine?

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A Valentine mani.

No holiday passes CBXB by without the need to paint my nails gaudily accordingly.Β  So here’s my stab at melting hearts with my mani this week.

I used a trio of colors to achieve my look:

Trio

Salon Perfect in Silver Plated, Sally Hansen in White On and Orly in Star Spangled.

After applying one swipe of base coat, I painted two coats of White On and let it dry a few minutes.

Step One

Then, I put a thick coat of Orly’s Star Spangled on the tips of my talons.

Add the red

To take the gaudiness up a notch, I applied a thin line of Silver Plated in between the red and white hues. Followed by one swipe of my all-time favorite Seche Vite Dry Fast top coat.

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Then I did what any grown woman does after painting her nails.Β  I started matching my nails to Valentine’s decor.

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Be mine.

Be mine.

And why stop at decor, when you can color coordinate your mani to the wine you’ll be guzzling?

What pants?

The cork in this bottle reads “Who wears the pants? I wear the pants.” No one tell Teddy!

Now I just need to get a matching wine glass (or two – you know, one for each manicured hand).

CBXB

CBXB!

Gold Dipped Digits

A little afternoon pick-me-up never hurts, especially if your mani matches your mug.

Missoni for Target tea cup inspired nails.

Missoni for Target tea cup complimenting my nails.

I thought winter wasn’t a time for bright white (as I look about as pasty as a malnourished Cinderella and the colorless hue could possibly add to the dull of my skin) but I felt inspired after seeing Kitt Noir’s accent nail on Instagam and decided to put my own spin on the look.

duo

OPI nail polish in Glow Up Already and Sally Hansen Xtreme Wear in White On.

After one swipe of base, I applied two coats of White On and once semi-dry, I tipped my talons with a thick strip of Glow Up Already (this has to be my all-time favorite name of a nail polish thanks to many ex-boyfriends). Topping the entire mani off with a stroke of Seche Vite Dry Fast Top Coat (the best you’ll ever use) on each nail, I was happily satisfied with the look.

Even more delighted with how the mani complimented my cup.

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Oh it’s close to happy hour…

My cup that’s filled with all kinds of fun on a Monday afternoon…

It's five o'clock somewhere.

It’s five o’clock somewhere.

Skinny Pirate, anyone?

CBXB

CBXB!