Pussy Party Time!

While Mama is away, the cat will play.

And play.

And play.

Where in the hell is my mom?

Mom’s gone?! PARTY TIME!

Ever wonder what you’re pet is up to while you’re away from home? While I was living it up in Vegas this past week, Ted was treating his life like a never-ending party as well (kind of like the Tidy Cat party commercial).

See me?

Dragging tinsel all over the house, decorating for his shindig.

Inviting his pals over to play…

WTF?

Party goer Jaycee is thinking “WTF?” (What The Feline?!)

Pounding Mike’s Hard Lemonade – really living it up like a classy cat (as I usually force him to guzzle Skinny Pirates).

After a cold one...

Feels so good when it hits the lips.

After crushing the can on his forehead, it’s time to taunt the neighbor dogs who are incessantly barking (pleading, really) about getting to come over to the Tedstar’s party.

It's time to look out the window.

Sorry. Nope. Invitation only.

After getting all kinds of filthy during the party, it’s time to wash all of the sins away.

Take a bath...

High on the perch, overlooking his kingdom.

And then settle in for some TV time (he’s typically only allowed 10 hours in front of the boob tube per day)…

And settle in for some TV.

Trying to set the world record of feline TV watching.

Before picking up the aftermath of the party.

Destruction...

Looks like a party scene from a ’80s movie, huh?

And upon my return, this is the sad face I get – as if nothing ever happened while I was away.

Yay

Who me? I just laid on my favorite plastic Target sack and missed the shit out of you. Yawn.

And I always fall for it. Every time.

Somebody’s got me right where he wants me.

CBXB

CBXB!

Cheers to a New Year!

Spending the last day of the year on a Miami beach was a tough feat.

Sunglasses always do the trick.

Squeezing out the last bit of 2012 fun.

And I didn’t mind gazing at this gorgeous sunset as I sipped on my happy hour cocktails (booze makes primping so much more fun).

Hard times with a night in Miami

See ya 2012!

Choosing a vodka proved to be as difficult as narrowing down a sparkly ring from Cartier (although I somehow managed).

I cheated on my Skinny Pirates with vodka

Cheating on my Skinny Pirates with Grey Goose.

I had a little help from my favorite Miami Meower, Butterscotch in the attire department.

Wardrobe assistant

Vocal wardrobe assistant (don’t tell Ted)!

I settled on black sequined pants (duh), a fuchsia cardigan and leopard heels, (and yes, that’s my heel in my cup which didn’t deter this party goer from drinking – why would I waste?!).

Nothing but class with bare feet in the posh elevator!

Isn’t everyone chic in Miami (aside from yours truly as I’ve proven)? Here’s a peek at my favorite bartender of the evening, pouring me a much needed glass (or five) of champs.

Bartender Miami Chic

Miami’s version of Hugh Hefner.

And while looking at this handsome Florida gent, I wondered what I was missing in Nashville, as the phone buzzed with a picture of my dad and my curiosity quickly waned.

or Nashville Geek

Miami chic or Nashville geek? Tough choice!

Obviously, you can’t take Nashville out of the girl as I carried my red Solo Cup with me down the elevator.

Red Solo Cups are so chic - only in Miami.

Red Solo Cups are so fancy – in Toby Keith songs.

I realized my true calling during my jaunt to the car…

look but don't touch

Game show gesture model!

I just kept getting better and better as I tried to get ascloseaspossible to this Bentley without spending my New Year’s Eve in the Miami Dade County Jail.

Yes, now I want to work on the Price is Right.

Yes, now I want to work on the Price is Right.

All of the car modeling made me thirsty and I needed to quickly guzzle a martini when we arrived at the bar.

Martini mania

Soothing the three minutes of modeling work.

And after each drink was received, a toast was in order – it was New Year’s Eve after all!

Our 1,345th toast of the evening.

Our 1,345th cheers of the evening.

Which of course led to my expertise in photo bombing (a dying art).

model

Almost 2013!

And as the clock struck midnight and Ryan Seacrest winked at me, I was pretty sure this is how the evening went…

Although my dreams looked like this...

A handsome group.

Drinking 432 martinis will help you acquire double chin while you sleep (not so good for my modeling career), as well as require a sign to arise from deep, dark (passed out) slumber.

Drinking 432 martinis will give you a double chin while you sleep, as well as require a sign for your to arise from slumber.

WAKE UP!

A brand new year, same old me.

CBXB

CBXB!