Mini-Manse of Horrors

No plans for thee on All Hallows’ Eve?

Might I entice you to my monstrous mini-manse of horrors for a little hair-raising Halloween celebrating?

Upon arriving to my haunted house, you will be greeted by a semi-scary wreath (you can’t live below the Mason Dixon line without a wreath hanging on your door. I’m serious. It’s like a law down here).

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A skull bust and candles will acknowledge your arrival as you step into the entryway.

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A Ghostess with the Mostess (you know, yours truly) will be your petrifying party guide for the nightmarish heyday.

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A party at my palace wouldn’t be complete without a ghoulishly gussied up Glamingo (compliments of my friend G).

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Turning into the cocktail lounge area, we’ll kick the eerie evening off with a mysterious martini after you select your glass from which you’ll be guzzling.

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As we pass by the buffet, selections of spine-chilling snacks will be stacked in the jack-o-lantern for your ghostly delight.

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Wicked wine is amassed in the corner bar if a mysterious martini isn’t for you (although you can have both. In fact, I encourage it).

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We’ll then stock the bar cart with our favorite spellbinding spirits to wheel us through the rest of our twilight.

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Gory goodies reside in the lobodomized skulls (which will come in handy as the witching hour grows near).

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Turning into the kitchen a ghastly ghost of a lazy susan will welcome your entrance.

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You’ll get the chills when you walk by my under used oven, which has not often felt the heat of its own fire.

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Glitter flaunts itself in the form of a beastly BOO atop my kitchen cabinet.

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While eyeballs behind the glass will be watching your every move.

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If you try any terrifying tricks, you may meet the Grim Reaper. Or maybe end up oozing out of the freezer.

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A devilish crew will be there as you step into the bloodcurling bathroom.

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Skeletons costumed as witches will leer from their ledges.

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And my little furry warlock will howl when it’s time for a refill.

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As midnight draws near, we’ll make our way into my living room full of fear. (Disco balls and guitars are so damned terrifying, right?)

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Otherworldly orange hues will illuminate from the tower of the piano.

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And shadowy skulls will eye you from the coffee table.

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A petrifyingly polite Johnny Cash will escort you to your seat.

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Try not to be startled as this skull flickers red from within…

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Or when cat eyes glow your way as you settle in.

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Candles will be lit before the lights draw dim…

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To prepare you for the movie madness about to begin.

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No spells or potions can keep you away and being a no-show tomorrow is not a smart play.

See you around dusk then?

If not, heads will roll….

Happy Haunting!

CBXB