The Surprise Attack

Sometimes when you get a wild hair up your ass you just gotta go with it, which is how I ended up in Iowa for a long weekend.

Surprise kisses from Nashville!

Surprise kisses from Nashville!

I decided to road trip it in order to sneak attack my sister for her birthday and to also get in a twin fix as they just turned two last Saturday.

Hard to believe this was over 700 days ago.

Hard to believe this was over 700 days ago.

Even harder to believe that this feels like 70,000 days ago.

Even harder to believe that this was more than 7,000 days ago.

Suffice to say, it’s going to be a very fun weekend…

Suffice to say, it's going to be a very fun weekend.

Especially if these two have anything to do with it.

Here’s hoping you get a hair up your ass and do something a little wild this weekend, too.





How to Make Your Mom Piss Her Pants

And/or throw her back out…

When I was a kid, my friend Scooby (yes, the one who was just here this weekend. Miss our shenanigans? Do yourself a favor and click here,) had a knack of hiding in my front bushes at any time of the day or night.  He’d wait for the opportune moment to pop up, pound on the windows and give my mother a heart attack (her chair sat right next to the window), therefore making her piss her pants or throw her back out (thankfully, she has a strong heart but a weak bladder after two 10 lb babies).

The master of suspense would also creep around the back of my house on a Saturday night, while I was watching movies downstairs and just stand in the light outside the double french doors and stare.  My sister and I would scream bloody murder, therefore making my mother sprint like an Olympian to the basement from her slumber.

So what better way to spend a drunken Saturday afternoon when Scooby was visiting Nashville than to perform a surprise attack on my mom? It was a no-brainer in our book.



Is that a pee face?

Is that a pee face?

Full disclosure: The pictures below are staged reenactments.  No mother was hurt during this photo shoot.


She can’t believe history is repeating itself.

Full Disclosure: A reinactment

Do you like the props we added for dramatic effect?

I’m proud to state that no bladders were emptied and all back muscles remained in tact during this scare.

Does that mean Scooby is losing his edge?


Revisiting the chest clutch.

My mom sure hopes this is true.