I started my weekend off on the wrong paw by showing Ted my friend Phil Lanoue’s handy work – as he put me on the cover of Vogue magazine (because he felt awfully sorry for yours truly, as my little fur ball is garnering all sorts of national attention (in our minds) with his appearances in Times Square and on Jumbotrons).
Who’s that girl?
Well, when I showed Ted my teeny, tiny amount of notoriety, he was pissed. And sulked all evening on a plastic grocery sack. Drama King.
I’m the center of this universe, dammit!
So while Ted pouted away, I thought it would be a good idea and make all kinds of friends at my new mini manse by becoming the resident Clark Griswold of my new neighborhood.
Fully loaded with lights.
Of course I couldn’t handle such a task all by my lonesome and my folks were happy to assist (well, really my mom and I started by assisting my dad but you get the point). The first order of business was figuring out how in the hell to load the staple gun. After about 28 minutes of confusion, my dad concluded you load the staples from the bottom (WTF?), instead of the traditional way of loading them on top.
How the hell…
Then my not so tiny dad hopped up on a step stoop that got wobblier by the second…I wasn’t sure if I would be able to catch him if a screw popped out.
As Dad was stapling the electric cords, he had a peanut gallery of one giving direction (and not being annoying. At all).
No, that’s not how you do it.
After about three seconds of me barking orders, we switched positions.
I got this…
Wait, this nail? Or that one? TELL ME!
Mom got the fortunate position of untangling the strings of lights.
Lucky light lady!
Fortunately no injuries were acquired while hanging the lights but I almost had my arm pulled out of my socket dismounting from the step stool.
Damsel in distress!
That’s OK, the shoulder can pop back into place with ease. Right?
While it wasn’t dark enough to enjoy the fruits of our labor just yet, we could tell this was going to be one fabulous party patio!
Hurry up darkness, we need to see our creation in all of its glory.
The Nashville light crew became ultra jealous at the picture of our little bebes in Iowa floating their cares away in a pool. I’m such a shitty host for forgetting to get my inflatable pool out. DUH.
Bathing beauties.
I tried to make up for the fact that my folks and I were sweating our asses off with no plastic pool to jump into by serving some chilly cocktails. Only when I went to serve them I hit a wall. A round, furry wall who wasn’t about to budge his pudgy ass off of the tray.
Cattail anyone?
Doing without the fancy red tray, I was able to soak in Skinny Pirates and the party atmosphere on my newly spruced up Griswold deck.
Clark would be proud, don’t you think?
This is only the beginning. Wait until I put the rest of my lights around my deck posts.
My neighbors are going to be in all kinds of love with me.
Have a fabulous week, my friends!
CBXB
